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 So what is the “perfect mom”? It is very difficult to answer this question unequivocally. Someone already considers themselves to be a completely fulfilled and absolutely ideal mother, while someone remains dissatisfied with the result of their activities all their lives. And does mom have to be so perfect? After all, we are all not perfect and are prone to make mistakes, and it is so important that the child grows up with the understanding that the mother is also a human being, so she cannot always fulfill all his needs.
But often it is extremely important for women to earn this prestigious social status called "ideal mother" in the eyes of the public. And this is not surprising - at once a lot of moralizing, admonitions, questions disappear, and life becomes somehow easier, which is very important for a young mother. However, even more sadly, the ideal mother in the eyes of the public is this woman, whose children are always properly fed, cleanly dressed, rosy-cheeked and obedient. And few people think that behind this happy shell, often, there is more than one unhappy childhood fate and a spoiled childhood.
It is rare to see parents who pay attention to the downside of parenting. And in vain! For example, such a seemingly elementary thing as understanding can solve many problems in communication and education of your child. How often can you hear from your children the phrase: "You don't understand me!" As a rule, parents are inclined to answer: “What problems can you have?” Without even trying to grasp the essence of the matter. By brushing aside the inner world of the child in this way, we risk becoming absolutely strangers to him, because only the closest and dearest person should first of all entrust their secrets to our children.
Another important component in a harmonious relationship between children and parents is participation in the life of their offspring. Participation in all spheres of their life: in their studies, in their hobbies, their thoughts and feelings. You should not abstract yourself and separate your "adult" life from the life of a child. After all, this is often not only useful for raising children, but also interesting and informative for the parents themselves. Paradoxical as it may seem, but it is our own children who are able to teach us a lot, to give us the opportunity to look at ourselves from the outside.
Based on the two previous components of the "ideal mother", the third follows - this is the acceptance of your child as he really is, and not as we would like. You shouldn't place your lack of fulfillment on the fragile shoulders of a child. Children are not obliged to finish for us what we could not or could not. In the end, this is unlikely to add to your happiness. And, of course, one should not demand from a son or daughter to be always and in everything good and correct. Remember how difficult it is to be perfect.
So, summing up, we can say that in order to be an ideal mother, you need to pay more attention to the inner world of your child. However, you should not forget to focus, first of all, on the individual characteristics of your children, their age, the nature and characteristics of the perception of your pedagogical experiments.
Katty
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