Education of will in children

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Education of will in childrenIn Nikolai Nosov's work "Vitya Maleev at School and at Home", the hero of the story - a fourth-grade student - promised every day that he would only play football a little with the boys, and then teach his lessons, and, however, every time he came home when necessary had supper and go to bed. There was no time left for lessons.

Can Vitya be called a deceiver, a liar? Of course not. Vitya made a promise with a sincere intention to fulfill it, but he simply is not able to keep his word, because his will is insufficiently developed. He, like many boys and girls of his age, often still cannot break away from a fun game, an interesting activity.

Let me give you another example. Kolya, a seven-year-old boy, was instructed to buy salt from the selmag. Proud of such a serious assignment, the boy goes to the store, a coin clutched in his fist, which he will give to the seller. But a column of athletes with an orchestra is moving towards him - a rare occurrence on this street. Kolya stops and, not noticing how the coin falls out of his hand, follows the orchestra.

Children, not only preschoolers, but also younger schoolchildren are still very impulsive, that is, their behavior is determined not by their intentions, not by the goal set for them, but by the current situation, random circumstances.

Many parents believe that the will, that is, the ability to carry out their intentions, appears in a child by itself as he grows older. Unfortunately, this is not so, and among adults there are weak-willed people whose behavior depends on completely random reasons. They may have the most wonderful intentions, but they are not always fulfilled.

Of course, all parents would like their children to grow up as strong-willed, energetic, active people, capable of persistently striving for the set goal, overcoming obstacles.

Such qualities appear in a person only as a result of proper education.

The first and prerequisite for proper upbringing is the organization of the child's independent activity.

As early as possible, you need to teach the child to dress and undress, eat himself, clean up toys after him. Those mothers who do for the child what he can do for himself are making a gross mistake. They delay the development of many of his abilities, including will.

In large families, younger children learn a lot by imitating their elders. In a family where the child is alone or there is a big age difference between the children, the baby must be taught to self-service.
knowledge and ability to play independently. This is very important for the development of his volitional qualities: he learns to own objects, things, learns to subjugate them. The stocking is already easily pulled on the leg, whereas before for some reason the heel was always at the top, the cubes do not fall apart, the pencil draws, the needle sews, and does not prick the hands to blood.

Education of will in childrenBy teaching children to self-service, to play independently, we educate them to be able to act expediently. It will not be difficult for these children to get used to school work.

Entering school is a very important event in the life of every child. The school environment is so new and unusual for the kid that even children prepared for school lose confidence in themselves for a while. They would like to do all their work, all the tasks of the teacher under the guidance of adults. But this should not be allowed.

For example, a first grader is asked to learn poetry. He would be glad if his mother or father taught these verses with him, as they did when he was a preschooler. However, one cannot yield to his desire. It is necessary to ensure that the child learns poetry alone.

Many parents do the right thing by checking daily how the little student has learned his lessons. But he must be able to check himself, to make sure that he knows everything well. It is possible and necessary to check the student's bag before sending him to school, but it is important that he first assemble it himself.

You should never do for a child what he can do without outside help, on the contrary, you should, wherever possible, teach him to be independent. This is the first condition for the development and education of the will.

The second most important condition is to teach the child to follow the rules of social behavior, to obey adults.

From a young age, the child should know the word "no" and obey it. This can only be achieved if the educators are always firm and persistent in their demands.

First, you need to seriously think over exactly what requirements you consider necessary to present to the child, and then steadily strive to fulfill them. To demand from a child - this, of course, does not mean shouting at him, threatening him, but it is unacceptable to persuade or beg: "Well, please, son, drink some milk, mom is asking you very, very much." You need to calmly and firmly, from day to day present certain requirements, and the child will get used to obeying them.

If the baby is capricious, stubborn, this means that he was not only not taught to unconditionally follow the orders of adults, but, on the contrary, he is accustomed to the fact that adults obey his desires, being afraid of his screaming and crying.

Why did a perfectly healthy, normal child become capricious?

It happened that his parents presented him with unreasonable, unrealizable demands and were immediately forced to cancel them; it also happened: parents will make some order, and then forget about it, do not check whether it is fulfilled, or, even worse, violate their own requirement. And now the baby gets used to the fact that it is not necessary to carry out the orders of adults.

Children are not born stubborn, capricious and disobedient — poor parenting makes them so. Parents should remember that their child will face great difficulties in the school team if he does not get used to obeying the demands of adults before school. It will not be easy for him in the future if his parents do not accustom him to self-discipline, to the ability to manage himself and his behavior.

The range of requirements for a child depends on his age. But every preschooler should be required to comply with the daily routine, be polite and accurate.

The presence of responsibilities is the third and, perhaps, the most important condition for the education of will.

In fulfilling duties, the child gets used to being useful to the people around him. If you do not accustom him to this, he will become an egoist who only cares about himself.

It's never too late to correct parenting mistakes and train your child to care for others. But, of course, if the child has grown up, this will not be easy to achieve. He will have to break the bad habits that have taken root in him, and this will require a lot of endurance, firmness and perseverance from the parents.

Therefore, it is necessary to instill in children the idea that they should participate in work together with adults. For example, a four-year-old baby walks with his mother from the store. He only holds on to the bag in which she carries the purchases, but it seems to him that he is helping his mother carry a heavy bag. When the child grows up, he needs to be given assignments that he will carry out independently. Previously, he washed dishes with his mother, now he washes alone. And even later, the child has permanent responsibilities. And parents must certainly make sure that he does his job accurately, at the exact time indicated.

Of course, the responsibilities of a preschooler are extremely simple and few, but they become a significant daily event in his life.

The child should know that all people have their own responsibilities, that all things are created by the labor of people, that people mutually help each other.And parents should in every possible way celebrate the benefits that the baby brings with his work, rendering any service to mom, dad, grandmother, sister.

The presence of duties forms the moral character of the child and at the same time strengthens his will, since he learns to do important and necessary work even when he wants to do something else. Well fulfilling the instructions of the parents, the preschooler prepares in advance for the upcoming school work.

It is necessary to ensure that the child's responsibilities are within his power. You cannot, for example, expect that a small schoolboy himself will be able to monitor his daily routine. He is unable to do this. His regime is monitored by his elders. In any case, if the child is in difficulty, you need to help him. First of all, you need to come to the aid of a child in order to teach him how to cope with difficulties, as well as to emphasize the importance of the task entrusted to him: “Since you cannot cope alone, I will help you, because this business cannot be left unfinished, it must be done. "

And when the work is done and done successfully - albeit by joint efforts - the child receives deserved moral satisfaction. And he will now embark on a new independent assignment with greater eagerness, with a greater readiness to bring the matter to an end.

These three conditions: independence, the ability to obey and the fulfillment of duties are the most important for the development of volitional qualities in a child.

The child's will will develop as his duties become more complex, as he learns to independently cope with increasingly difficult tasks, overcoming various difficulties that arise on his way. And he will grow up as an energetic, persistent person, become an active, purposeful member of society.

A. V. Vedenov, Candidate of Pedagogical Sciences, "Peasant Woman", 1954

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